[	mood	|	sleepy	]
[	music	|	Ben Folds Five: Brick	]

I had fun today... Benjamin came over at like 12:00 this afternoon, and stayed until like 7:30 P.M.. We had a lot of fun. When he went home, he called me, and after we got off of the phone, I got online... And then he got online. We were talking, and he said the most sweetest thing ever...

Benjamin: If I was old enough, I would ask you to marry me. That is how serious I am about you, and how in love with you I am. I promice you, the day I turn 18, I will ask you to marry me. (You will be 16 for a day, but... Only for a day)

I started to cry when I read that. I just can't stop thinking about the fact that I REALLY honestly think I am going to spend the rest of my life with him. Whenever I think about it, I get butterflies in my stomach... Good ones though. And I can imagine what it would be like if him and I were together forever. I love him so fucking much. I really have never felt this way about ANYONE in my life before. I know I have said that about a lot of people before Benjamin came along, but... I never knew what love actually felt like. But, now I do. I don't give a rat's infested herepe's ass if you people are saying, "Pshhh, fuck that. You can't be in love at age 14." Hell shyeah ya can. You may not know it... But, I sure as hell do.

My definition of Love: 

      A deep feeling, that is towards another person (someone you love); Deep affection, desire; An emotion you have for someone else; Very fond of a person; Passionate... Something you have never felt before with your boyfriend/girlfriend/mate.

[	mood	|	crazy	]
[	music	|	David Bowie: Magic Dance	]

Yeah... Today has been a grand day. Listening to lots and lots of David Bowie... ^.^ :-P Hehe. ::dances:: Haha, I am so crazy. I got a new SN... again. I HAD to get an SN that is named after a Bowie song. It is:   diamondDogs 07   The song is called Diamond Dogs, and it is track 07 on Album: ChangesBowie... haha. Shyeah!

Last night, I watched Finding Nemo a total of: 3 times. And the reason being, is that I get scared VERY easily, and when I was on the phone with Benjamin, he was telling me all of these scary stories and stuff... And he made me cry. Not really meaning to, but, it was really my own fault, because he was like, "Yeah, I am going to stop. I don't wanna scare you anymore." And then I said, "NO! Keep on going!" haha. It was silly.

Anyways, I have to go. I am going to spend time with my Mommy, until Benjamin calls, and let's me know when he is coming over so that we can have fun!! :-D:-D Alrighty... Byebye now. ::waves::

((.cassandra.))

.eye.love.ben.

[	mood	|	bouncy	]
[	music	|	David Bowie: Rebel Rebel	]

I went over Benjamin's today. I had A LOT of fun... We were "watching" Alien 4. From as much as I saw, it was pretty good. And then tomorrow, from when my mother gets up at 10:00 A.M., and till like... 12:00 A.M., Benjamin is coming over. :-D Hehe. ^.^ He makes me feel so special. ::dances to David Bowie:: I have a sudden rush of... I HAVE TO LISTEN TO BOWIE! Haha. I have no frikking idea why, but hey... It's all good. La la la. I fell asleep to Bowie last night. It relaxes me, because most of his stuff is all mellow glam rock. haha.

My Manda is going through a rough time right now. And I feel so bad for her. I am not going to say what all is going on, but... All I know is that she deserves someone SO much better then Rob, the dill hole she is going out with now. >:-O Rahhh

Anyways, I am going to get going, because I have to clean. Heh... yay. ::sighs:: Byebye now. ::waves::

((.cassandra.))

.eye.love.ben.

[	mood	|	scared	]
[	music	|	Ben Folds Five: Brick	]

Benjamin came over today. He got home eariler then planned... Which is always a good thing. :-) He makes me happy. Tee hehe. ^.^ I am so happy I am with him. I really think I have this obsession thing with him... Because I only talk about him. Haha. Oh well. ::shrugs:: Anyways... I didn't get to hang out with Manda today. She was hanging out with Gian, so I found it worthless if I went over to hang out with her. Oh well. I really miss her. We had a lot of good times that we still share. Which is also a good thing. La la la...

Anyways, on the other hand... I have had a better day then yesterday, and the day before... Which I like the idea of. Since I haven't had a great weekend. I started haveing a better weekend when Benjamin called me, and asked me if I wanted to hang out. And of course... My answer was... YES! I mean, no one else wanted to hang out with me. I was just happy he wanted to hang out with me.

::yawns:: Bahhhh!! I am so tired. But, I am not going to be able to sleep, because Benjamin was telling me all of this scary stuff, and it REALLY freaked me out. He took this cat mask thing that I had a bad dream about... (Heh... sounds cheesy), and I told him OVER AND OVER that I hated that mask... So, he took it, and put it on his hand, and I didn't know he did, because my back was turned, so I couldn't see. I turned around, and it was RIGHT in my face, so I started to have a panic attack. It scared me so badly. I cried my eyes out. He felt so bad about it. He didn't mean to actually scare me. He just didn't think I was that scared about it.

But.. yeah... I am. He took it home, and it going to do something with it, so that I don't have to see it ever again. ::yawns again:: Well, it my time to go... I will update this tomorrow, and tell you if I slept or not. Byebye now... ::waves::

((.cassandra.))

.eye.love.ben.

[	mood	|	hyper	]
[	music	|	Dying Fetus: Skull Fucked	]

Today has been fun... ^.^ I woke up at like 10:00, ate a Bagel, got online, made this thingy... Started to clean my room, went to 7-11, got some slurpees with my daddy, and then came home... And now I am writing in this WONDERFUL journal thingy. :-) Hehe.

I might be going over Manda's house tonight... I hope I can. Because I miss all of the good times we have had together. And I just miss her. She is the greatest. I lub her SOO muchly! ^.^  La la la... I am really hyper. Tee hehe. It is Snowing! Actually... It is Raining. I HATE the Snow. And the Rain. Well, I like the rain, sometimes. When I am in a good mood, and it is raining, it relaxes me. So, therefore I like it. 

::headbangs to some good ol' Dying Fetus:: ROOOARR!! ::plays my bass:: Tra la la. I love my Manda! ^.^ I feel bad though... Because her Mommy is being a bitch to her. She is letting Manda's little sister have her friend sleep over, and Manda cleaned the WHOLE house for her mother too... But, she isn't letting her do anything. :-( I LOVE YOU MANDA!!

Welp, I am gonna go... I don't know why, but... haha. Welp, byebye now. ::waves::

((.cassandra.))

.eye.love.ben.